Not Afraid

What do you do when you fall so low where getting up is not an option? What do you do when everything you've ever mapped up gets torn to shreds? Everyone goes through tough times. And there are no answers, no solutions, no tricks or patterns.

I've hit rock bottom. But, I'm slowly floating back up. I wise woman told me that everyone thinks differently. Even the slightest age difference in your teen years means decades. An 18 year old thinks much differently than say a 16 year old. I've learned that you are given chances to start anew, and that these chances should be utilized to the fullest.

Enough of that philosophic stuff. On to my life. Well, here's the low down. You get hit, you stand back up. You get hit twice, you get up even faster. You get blown to shreds, you accept the damage and move on. Everyone gets what they deserve, and sooner or later, you will get yours. No one deserves to be lead on, not a soul. It really hits hard when you sit day in and day out fighting and trying for something you never had. You sit and wonder what could you possibly be doing wrong, and than it hits you-- you aren't doing anything wrong. I never got the fair shot I deserved to get you, and you know that. I never crossed your mind as much as you say I did, and you know that. You kept me in the dark, talking mindless circles. But you will soon find out, my dearest, that everyone gets their own. You said you never wanted to lose me, well, you just ran a flawless course on how to lose someone.

It's nothing personal. However, I feel I must tell you, I'm not afraid. This is it, I'm done. No more saying things just to please you. No more doing things just to please you. You think it was bad before? Just wait dear, dawn will not arrive until Hell rises.