Here We Go

I need to start writing again. It's just so hard to do it when i have so much other crap going on in my life. But i guess i need to make time for it. Writing was something that kept me sane. It was something that kept me going, and for the most part, made me look at the brighter side of things. It brought out the inner emotions, and lets face it, it's what made me me. Some days i wonder where it all went, why i just stopped all of a sudden. I think it had to do with the fact that deep down inside, i knew i wasn't good. I also knew that it was going to get me nowhere. But recently i've realized that maybe it has nothing to do with the fact that i'm bad, or that it's going to get me nowhere. Because i always wrote for me. I never wrote for the sake of one day getting published or so that people would tell me how good i was. It was all because i needed to get some emotions out. So that is what sparked this whole revamping of my writing.

Something else the world should probably know. This new girl has got me wrapped around her finger. And i'm cool with that. Kind of. I guess we're kind of dating now. Maybe. I'm not exactly sure. It's complicated.

Song of the day:

Are We All Forgotten by Paper Route

Listen Up Missy

This post is just for you missy. And you know exactly who you are. (i feel like we're little kids bickering at each other every time we do this through posts haha)

Any who, just so you know, i don't sleep around. I promise. I haven't been with anyone in a long time. If you're hearing stories than they're stories. Do i hook up with them? Yeah, probably. But not sex. And yes i do remember their names, ya butt.

ANNNNNNNNND. I actually don't drink that much anymore! I know, shocker. Mainly because since i'm an RA now i have to be mister responsible for my building. And on top of that i want to be president of my fraternity next week which would mean absolutely no drinking. Sad day. But i miss you. A lot. It sucks that we don't/can't talk anymore. But i love the random texts you'll send me on holidays haha. And i am still the new/old me. If anything, i'm a better version of that since i don't drink as much and all that jazz. A lot has actually happened this semester that i have to tell you about, but it's not the easiest thing to do since our communication is really spotty. But i'm sure at one point or another we can talk about all of it.

I miss you a shit ton!

Song of the day:

Young, Wild, and Free by Snoop Dogg ft. Wiz Khalifa and Bruno Mars

Holy Shit

So here's the thing. I didn't know running for president was going to be this stressful. Everyday, from the moment i wake up from the moment i go to sleep, that's all i can think about. Every conversation i have with anyone leads to my running for president cause they either want to know how it's going or what my plans are. But the hardest part is hearing about the other candidate campaigning like a mother fucker. Which scares the hell out of me. But that's not even the worst part. The worst part is that i still have to do my everyday stuff. Like i still have to do all of my RA business, every single day, I still have to go to Distinction in Public Affairs tomorrow for two hours, and to top it all off, i made it to the second round for becoming a SOAR leader this summer and my interview is on tuesday. Like running for president isn't enough pressure, i have all of this other added pressure and then people getting on to me about stepping up my game for campaigning and then semi-formal season is here and i got asked to two sorority semi-formals but i can't go to either of them cause i have other stuff going on that same night. AND my semi formal is in 3 weeks. Guess who doesn't have a date? THIS GUY. FML.

Song of the day:

Perpetuum Mobile by Penguin Cafe Orchestra

Don't Know Where You're Going

There's something about happiness that is magical. I'm beyond tired. Beyond drowsy. Beyond sick. And beyond just drained. But at the end of the day, I can always go to sleep happy. That's been the one thing that's been keeping me going. I can't tell you the last time i got a full nights sleep, or the last time i wasn't sick, or the last time i had more than one meal in a day. But i can tell you the last time i smiled, the last time i felt on top of the world. That's all it takes i guess. Everything will just fall into place. It always has, and it always will. Just don't force it. Be who you want to be and be whatever makes you happy.

Song of the day:

Ass Back Home by Gym Class Heroes ft. Neon Hitch

That One Girl

Tonight, i had a random girl that i have never seen before in my life come up to me and tell me something. It seemed like this girl knew me better than most people that i call my friends. As creepy as it sounds, and trust me it was pretty damn creepy, she just started telling me stuff about myself. she started saying how i'm the type of guy a girl wants, but will never like. She told me that every girl WANTS to like me, but they never can because of the way i am. I didn't get it, so i told her to explain it. She proceeded to tell me that it wasn't my fault at all, and that there was nothing i could actually do about it. She said that girls just "fawn" over me. Now at this point i had no idea what fawn meant, so she told me, and then it made sense. She said that she bets that i have never striked out before, which is true. She said that i could have a booty call ready in a text with less than three words. She was right. I asked her how she knew all of this about me. She told me that it wasn't hard to figure out. People talk. She said that being a sorority girl has its perks, one of them being that you figure out which one the guy to go after is, why he's the guy to go after, and then you figure out why he's still single. Again, she was right. There's a huge reason why i'm single. I have booty calls, i made out with three girls this past weekend; in one night. It's tuesday and i had the opportunity to go home with someone. I'm a hoe. But i can't stop. Everyone else has stable relationships and stable girls. I can't have that. So instead of just being lonely and finding someone, i go from girl to girl; just so i don't have to be lonely. I guess the whole point of this story is that i've changed so much. Everything she said made me think about high school, and then it made me think of halloween, two years ago. I don't think i've ever had a more perfect halloween yet. I miss that stability.

Song of the day:

I'm On One by DJ Khaled

Ps: i'm really surprised i just wrote all of that out with minimal mistakes. You can take a guess why...stay classy.